Chapter XLI The Return of the Mummy

 

 

Next morning, the hens were up before the cock. I woke sensing that I was about to be devoured by an octopus as two pairs of hands and two pairs of legs meandered and slithered over my body. Meena was kissing my lips in a gentle attempt to wake me and Melanie was using the same method to bring my organ into life down below. It was around five o’clock and I had to perform again in that gruesome ritual where ravenous maidens of the morning seek their wild semen plucked from the fresh flesh of their menfolk. Morning is the time for female predators (as I think I have mentioned before), buzzing like insects drawing nectar from any plant in their immediate vicinity. Once the nectar is drawn the butterfly wings cease flapping and the fat male caterpillar can settle down once more in his chrysalis of deep sleep.

Soon all parties were asleep, both bitches and dog.

 

There was a ring at the outside door. I woke with a start and looked at my clock. Ten o’clock in the morning! Sunday morning. My two companions groaned and turned in their beds like satisfied slugs. I slipped out from in between them and rushed naked to the door phone.

“Councillor Axtell?”

“Yes?”

“It’s Phil Marchmont. As we agreed last night, Councillor.”

A big grin must have appeared on my face. I pressed the “Enter” button and told him “Third Floor”.

I walked back in my full birthday finery to the bedroom. Meena was still asleep, but Melanie was rubbing her eyes and asking sharply “What time is it? Who was that?”

“Nobody really”, I replied insincerely. “Just lie there, Melanie. I’ll get you a breakfast special. Not vegetarian are you?”

“No way,” she said.

“Good, stay there. Breakfast will be a little meaty. I’ll bring it to the bedroom in a couple of minutes.

“Time to go to the loo. Where are my clothes?” mumbled Melanie.

“Just go to the loo quickly. Don’t bother to dress for the moment. Just stay in the bedroom area. Don’t come into the sitting room for the moment. There’s someone at the door.”

“No fear.” She was about to wrap the bedclothes round herself to run to the loo when she realized that these same sheets covered a naked Meena too. Out of solidarity to her sleeping soul sister she left the bed-sheets in place and slipped out without a stitch and rushed to the adjoining room.

Meanwhile I had put on a kitchen apron onto my naked frame and made towards the front door. I could hear the lift closing in the corridor outside.

I let in a grinning Phil Marchmont with my finger firmly pressed to my lips.

We sat down in the sitting room. “Had breakfast?” He nodded. “Just a coffee and toast. That’s good enough for me, Councillor.”

“Phil,” I continued in a quiet voice. “Just call me Peter. Especially when I am dressed like this. Hopefully, we will have many years cooperation together, so let’s start it right. I am hoping that you will be applying for the post of Chief Planning Officer.” There was a pause as the young planner took this is in. “Think about it,” I said. “In the meantime, are you game for a little adventure?”

The huge but puzzled grin on his handsome boyish face was answer enough.

“OK, can you be very very very discreet?”

He nodded again.

“Do you know who I have in the bedroom?”

He shook his head.

“Two Councillors: Meena Chakravatty (he nodded and his grin broadened) and…. (I paused for effect) Melanie Sheldrake.” He looked at me in total astonishment. “But I thought…” He stopped dead in his tracks. Good lad. He remembered to keep his opinions to himself!

“You thought we hated each other?” I completed his train of thought.

“Yes” he replied apologetically.

“Looks can be deceiving. Officially we do hate each other, but here in the privacy of a consultation conference, we don’t. OK?”

“Yes,” he grinned again but still a little bewildered.

“If I threw you now into the lion’s den next door, would you survive?”

“One at a time, I could. Sounds like fun.”

“Phil, I can’t guarantee you one at a time. The advantage is that they are both still a little drowsy. They both got serviced about some three hours ago, and neither of them is expecting you. OK, you game?”

He shrugged his shoulders first, and then nodded his head excitedly. 

“Fine. Take off your shoes and socks. And your shirt. Keep your trousers low on your hips. Yes, that’s right. Like that. So that they can see your slim waist line. That will have them drooling. I’ll let you in now. Pretend to walk towards the adjoining bathroom on the left, then stop and let me do the talking. Ready?”

I opened the door. Melanie was back from the loo and still resting in bed but wide awake. Meena was still a little sleepy but actually thinking of getting up. Both were still stark naked under the untidy bedclothes.

“I thought you ladies might appreciate a little thank you present for your heroism and cooperation over the last 2 weeks.” They looked up at me expectantly. I opened the door more widely. A half-naked Phil walked in. “The bathroom is on the left,” I said to him. He began walking towards the loo door.

Meena and Melanie had a look of total panic on their faces. They drew the bedclothes sharply over their exposed breasts like old American maiden-aunts defending their honour and apple pie. In fact they drew the bedclothes so sharply they exposed their feet at the bottom end. Phil had stopped in his stride with his wide grin and looked at them hungrily.  

“Good morning, Councillor Miss Sheldrake. Good morning, Councillor Chakravatty.” He got his protocol right, I noticed. Very cool.

“Good morning, Mr Marchmont,” Meena answered more quickly. They had both admired him at the Planning Committee meeting, but Melanie was temporarily caught out. She could not remember his name.

“Please ladies,” he said, calmly sitting himself down at the edge of the bed. “Just call me Phil.”

“Right, Ladies. Right, Phil. I had forgotten that I had invited Phil this morning to discuss the future of the Planning Department and he just happened to pop in. Let me get you all some morning coffee. Stay where you are. Don’t do anything naughty.”

I pretended to slip off to the kitchen but I had left the door open deliberately. I was relishing this conversation.

“OK, call me Meena,” I could hear Meena say, “but her you just have to call Miss Sheldrake.”

“Don’t listen to her claptrap, Phil. I’m Melanie.”

“OK”.

 “Not OK. My name is Melanie. Repeat that!”

“Your name is Melanie. Hi. Looks like you had a comfortable night.”

“What exactly are you doing here, Phil?” Melanie asked a little suspiciously.

“Guess I’m sitting on the same bed as the two sexiest Councillors in Framden.”

“Wow! You cheeky little bastard!” said Melanie.

“Anyway not much competition is there, Melanie?” added Meena. “How would you know anyway?”

“Melanie, Meena, if you were to let me pull back these bed sheets just a little way, I could prove that to you.”

“Saucy!” said Meena.

“You just try, young man!” threatened Melanie.

“Phil. Just call me Phil,” he reminded them.

Suddenly he grabbed the bed cover and gave it a strong tug. I could see out of the corner of my eye as their tits and tummies and perhaps a little something else were temporarily exposed. The women shrieked and grabbed the bedcover back tucking it up again against their breasts like a comfort blanket.

“You naughty boy,” said Melanie. “I shall have to chastise you.”

“Well, there’s more than one way to skin a cat, or a kitten,” he added as an afterthought. He pulled up the bottom end of the bedclothes, exposing their feet and now their knees. “I don’t think either of you is wearing very much,” said Phil reprovingly. “Who exactly is being naughty here?”

“Why,” asked Meena provocatively, “Think you can handle us both?”

“I know I can, but I’m sure you ladies will be gentle with an inexperienced youngster like me.”

“Listen to him, the little boaster,” said Melanie. “It depends what you’re hiding behind that pair of hipsters of yours.”

“I don’t know if I should show you, Melanie. Something might happen, and we all get ideas.”

“Oh, cut the crap, Phil,” said Melanie impatiently. “Show us your strongest suit.”

Phil stood up lazily and fumbled slowly and deliberately as he unbuttoned the top of his trousers. He began moving his zip down. As the zip descended slowly he started backing away equally slowly from the bed. The girls leaned forward abandoning all pretence at modesty. As he had stepped away completely out of reach of the girls and his zip fastener was now completely undone, his trousers slipped ever so slightly over his hips and the girls got their first sighting of a hint of his pubic hair.

Melanie could contain herself no longer. She leaped out of bed automatically dragging along the bed clothes to wrap around herself. Meena suddenly screamed as she lay on the bed minus the blanket, completely naked and exposed. Melanie moved forward and grabbed Phil who moved back no further but Meena jumped naked out of bed to rip the bedclothes from Melanie’s grasp. The girls each started to pull at one end of the bedclothes. Phil circled around them provocatively as in a ritual dance, thrusting his pelvis and swaying his hips, until gradually his trousers slipped so low that from where I was standing I could see more than half his bottom cheekily exposed.

I was enjoying this show so much that I stepped back into the room. Phil was now standing precariously off balance as his trousers slipped ever lower on to the floor. So I gave him a push in the direction of the two girls still struggling with the bed sheet and all three fell on top of each other in a heap on the bed.

I could hear Melanie screaming in an unladylike frenzy to Meena. “Grab his pants. Grab his pants,” as one of the harpies held on to his arms and the other started removing his trousers and revealing his naked butt as beautiful, as ivory white and as mouth-watering as that of Michelangelo’s David.

And then all three naked revellers froze in a mid-tableau of butts and breasts in Renoiresque juicy abandon, but with faces transfixed in Goya-like horror, as a familiar voice spoke up just behind me.

“Good morning, everybody! The cruise ended half a day earlier as we had to miss Vigo because it was such bad weather. It’s lovely to see you all. Don’t mind me, will you? I was given a lift by this TV news team. How are you, Peter? Have you been eating your salads? Oh, I’m so sorry to interrupt you. Do any of you young ladies want a cup of tea?”

Behind her the camera crew was already whirring way while an astonished and excited reporter brought her Channel 4 mike closer to me.

“M-U-U-U-M!”